Yes, I enjoy Findom... But it does NOT define Me.

I enjoy Findom, but it does not define Me. I am so much more than just a "Financial Dominatrix." I enjoy Findom a lot... Don't get Me wrong here, but I also enjoy a variety of other things, kink and vanilla. If I was just soley into Findom I can't say that I would enjoy it as much. Variety is the spice of life so they say, and I couldn't agree more...

Look at it this way, you will rarely find a 100% pure finsub. Especially one who lasts LT. It's just not realistic. If you were to have your favourite meal every single day, for every meal for the rest of your life... Would it still be your favourite meal? Would you enjoy it as much? Maybe the first week, or even two it would be amazing, but eventually... You will tire of it, and crave something different, crave different flavours and ultimately you will want more.

This can apply to many aspects in life, your favourite song, your favourite movie, your favourite restaurant, they are your favourite because they aren't something you experience every day, they aren't the only thing you focus on in your life, and on the days when you aren't experiencing your favourite thing, and are experiencing other things it causes you value those favourites even more. If you were stuck in a room day after day with only your favourite things you would get over them real fast.

So how does this apply to Findom?? In more ways than you would think.

Generic repetitive Findom also gets boring... It is very easy to see who is inexperienced in this World, just by the way that a Domme will carry Herself. How many times a can you see the same, "Pay Me piggy losers, Goddess deserves all your pathetic money." Or the very well known "Fuck you, Pay Me." line? This to a experienced finsub/sub is boring and predictable, it's that bland spaghetti dish lacking flavour. A sub knows exactly what they are walking into when they read those lines. I'm not saying that those lines aren't ever successful but when they are it's because they appeal to fetishists more than finsubs/subs. And the issue with fetishists??? They care more about their pleasure than yours, it's about them, not you. And when they get what they want out of the "transaction" they will often vanish. So sure if you want to play the "typical" lines you will get some "hits" but they won't be quality ones, experienced subs in the kink World want more... And generally so do true Dommes. And that's just facts.

Findom to Me, is enjoyable, but when it comes to a D/s, and one that I hope to sustain LT, it's not going to be the end all. Findom is merely a component. Getting to know your sub is so important, and to the subs it is also just as important to get to know your Domme. Think of it this way, if you were to go on a regular Date, you and your date sit across from each other, eating, not talking, just looking at each other, nothing to talk about, awkward silences and no connection, and at the end of the date the the bill is paid perhaps you spend the night together and then you go your separate ways... Do you think you're going to see that person again?? I can say that I'm 99.999% sure that you won't. Human connection is so important in every single relationship in life, it doesn't matter if it's kink or vanilla. Transactional relationships are built to fail. If a sub is going to truly submit to a Domme and have it last, there has to be something more there, a pretty face telling you to pay her "just because" isn't enough. It will never be enough.

So other than a Findom what am I? Who am I? I am smart, I am funny, I am cruel and sadistic at times, I am a strong determined Woman, and I am an overall kinky individual. I am proud to be a Domme, and I am proud to embrace My kinks and to not deny who I am as a Person. I enjoy Findom as much as I enjoy sushi, but it's not the only thing that I enjoy. I enjoy talking to subs on a vanilla level, I won't always be in "Domme mode". Yes, I have a Dominant nature, it's who I am, but I will not always be in "Play mode." Think of it this way, humans enjoy sex, but it is humanly impossible to have sex 24hrs a day, the human body needs to recharge, and so does the mind of a Dominant. Just because you're a Domme, it doesn't mean that you have to be in "Domme mode" 24hrs a day, just like a sub won't always be in "sub space." A sub must always be respectful but he won't always be at his most vulnerable or be feeling super subby 24/7. And subs and Dommes should still be able to enjoy eachothers company when they aren't in that mode, and especially following, this is so crucial to maintaining a healthy D/s connection.

I am more than just a "Findom" and My subs are more than just subs, they're people too, and it would be a shame if I didn't take time to discover who they are behind the curtain. A sub is never just a "piggy," "loser," "human atm" or even just a "wallet." Behind all that is a human, with a life, a job, a family, friends and feelings, not someone you should take advantage of and destroy for your own financial gain. When a sub gives you control of their finances and at times their entire life, You as their Domme need to value that, and treat it with respect. A sub is a Dommes "property" and why would a Domme ever want to destroy Her own property? I'm not going to get into care and aftercare in this particular blog, but if you are uneducated about those things, I strongly suggest you look it up. A sub who trusts you and and who gives you his life is the ultimate gift, and disrespecting that gift for purely your own gain while putting their life at risk is absolutely disgusting. I'll leave it at that.

So, what have I touched on here? Findom is a component of who I am and what I enjoy but I am more than that. I am more than a transaction and so is that sub. Findom is so much more than numbers at the end of the day, and calling yourself a Findom without knowing what's at stake is highly irresponsible. So is calling things "Findom" that have nothing to do with it...

For example...

-Selling photos

-Selling clothing items

-Sessions

All are not findom. These are transactional and also selling a service and have NOTHING to do with Financial Domination as the sub gets something other than pleasure from the act in return.

Now you can do these things, there's nothing wrong with it but don't soley label it as Findom. Like I said, I am more than just a Findom. I also am I fetish clip artist, I also take fetish phone calls, and I enjoy torturing and humiliating My loyal subs in My day to day life, and yes, some of My clips and calls do incorporate Findom which I enjoy and I find a nice overlap works. Who doesn't like a good fusion meal? :) Mixing kinks is something that I find very enjoyable. I like to expand and explore My kinks, I like to push My boundaries and try things I haven't before, I never want to stop learning or experimenting. Just like My life in the Vanilla World I refuse to be put into a box. I refuse to colour within the lines, if what I'm doing gives Me pleasure and is not hurting anyone else, who is anyone to judge and why would I stop? Mind your own business.

Before I start rambling I will wrap this up. Yes, I enjoy Findom a lot, but I am also a Domme, a Woman and so much more. So don't expect Me to ever just stay in one lane. It's not going to happen, I will get bored, and don't ever ask Me to be generic or scripted, because I am so much better than that. I am amazing and I know it, and if you're lucky enough to get to know Me as more than just a "Findom" or a pretty face you will see that too. Screw standard definitions, and as I always say screw societal norms. Findom gets a bad wrap because of dilution that's happened as of late, but remember a Findomme is often more than just a Findomme and if you are just judging Her by Her appearance or kink shaming Her due to what She enjoys, who is the one that actually has the real issues?